Relationships in midst of support

The survey data showed that 82% of the adoptive parents were fairly or very satisfied with the pre-adoption assessment and preparation they had received. The same was been found true for the pre-adoption mediating service (83% satisfied) based on the same FinAdo-study (Eriksson 2015). The analysis of the open answers in the survey revealed that the basis for good service experiences and satisfaction lies in the interaction and relation between the client and the social worker, more than in the characteristics of the prospective adoptive parent, child, or the process itself. Features of the service experience which had the strongest associations with satisfaction were those where social workers were perceived to be emphatic, trustworthy and communicative. Furthermore, a positive experience was predicted by the perception of an open and unquestioning attitude of the social worker, and a supportive climate.

Those adopting a subsequent child were pleased with a familiar social worker that they knew and could trust. A negative attitude by the social worker or a perceived deficit in interpersonal skills were hardest to compensate for. These findings from the survey were also strengthened in the narrative data and indicates the importance of the relationship between the client and the professionals.

In the interview data, positive emotions were associated to parenthood (joy, happiness, and fulfilment), expectancy (anticipation and hope), and also with the actions of individual professionals. These positive emotions were often cognitive emotions such as gratefulness and relief following a stressful emotion or feared scenarios. The emotions were also personified and responses often linked to the actions of individual professionals. Many of the narrators wanted to point out their positive experiences within the pre-adoption services when they were grateful for the service and support they had received. As one expressed it, the experiences of adoption counselling were better than expected:

“The social worker that we had in the pre-adoption counselling, she gave us a really positive experience, when we kind of had expected that this counselling wasn´t going to be very pleasant. And then it was…”

My findings are in line with parental experiences of child welfare and protection studied in Finland (e.g. Hietamäki 2015). In this and other studies, a good working-relationship with the professional seems to be crucial for positive experiences of

the services (Hietamäki 2015; Holland 2000; 2011, Mason 2012). Prospective adoptive parents call for similar qualities (trust, empathy and understanding) in the professionals and the nature of the relationship (collaboration, acceptance, respect) as clients within child welfare services (e.g. De Boer & Coady 2007; Maiter, Palmer &

Manji 2006; Platt 2008). Furthermore, the same qualities of physicians in infertility treatment settings accounted for satisfaction among patients, and respect, empathy and personal care were seen as being most important in creating positive service experiences (Malin et al. 2001).

In social work, from a psychosocial approach, a positive relationship between the client and professional is essential for the outcome of the service. De Boer and Coady (2007) even claim that a good relationship is necessary for the provision of adequate child welfare services. Cree and Davies (2007) have found that social workers and users of social services see the basis for a good relationship to be trust between parties. Trust has also been found to be one key to achieving successful pre-adoption counselling (Eriksson 2007). Trust is built between two parties in a relationship. According to Sztompka (1999, 24, 69) trust is a strategy to tackle an unpredictable future through agency, but it always contains a risk of losing (Luhmann 1988, 97). According to Smith (2001, 228), “service users will not take the risk of giving a truthful account if they expect to be disappointed.” One father in my interviews said that he gave the social workers as much trust as they deserved, and referred to utilizing information control when needed in his interactions with them. In addition to being present in the immediate social interaction, emotions are grounded and shaped in the relationship, and negative emotions create a climate within the relationship which causes it to languish (Boiger & Mesquita 2012a).

Holland (2000) argues that the process and outcome of assessments based mainly on verbal interaction are closely connected to the interpersonal relationship between the client and professional. According to her, clients in child welfare assessments who are co-operative, motivated, and articulate in the relationship are ascribed the same general attributes, thus having an impact on the result of the assessment. On the other hand, this makes strategic action worthwhile from the point of view of the client. In the survey data, a communicative social worker tended to lead to greater satisfaction, which supports Trotter´s (2002) claims that good workers in child protection openly and honestly address aims, processes, roles and expectations within the setting. In the pre-adoption services, the professional´s communicability varied from communicating

the aims and expectations of the service, to communicating the on-going state of the evaluation of suitability, to the sharing of information during the process. When not doing so, it was perceived as a controlling practice.

In the qualitative data, many narrators depicted good relationships with professionals that were trustful, supporting and positive, and functioned as a good basis for both reflective discussions and self-evaluation. Social work expects a change to occur in clients through a self-realization achieved through self-reflection. Relationships with trust and mutual understanding are challenged when in the institutional space of pre-adoption services, a client is expected to be open, trusting and open to information, even though his or her suitability is being evaluated. Literature on reflection (Fook

& Gardner 2010, 188-189) claims that becoming aware of and challenging one’s own values and assumptions is difficult and even hard due to tendencies of dealing with matters purely intellectually, or through feelings of vulnerability that arise when doing so. Therefore a “safe environment is required for success” (Fook & Gardner 2010, 189). The emotional state also affects the handling of information and a person who feels threatened might not be responsive to information in terms of preparation.

This is especially true for those that feel questioned during the assessment and pre-adoption process, but might still proceed to adopt and then find they lack the needed preparation to face adoptive parenthood.

From the client´s point of view, a controlling setting challenges their possibility to be honest and to engage in honest reflection. When the client perceives the support turning into control without an insight into the problem (as defined by the professional), then strategic actions are utilized, hence lessening the trust and having the potential of turning into conflict. However, the whole process of a suitability assessment and proving emotional readiness is based on the evaluation of the

professionals as they hold the right to make the decision, so there is a clear imbalance that needs to be addressed through the development of a trustful relationship.

Partnership is often fostered in social work literature (e.g. Palmer, Maiter & Manji 2006), and requires a mutual goal to be established. Ryburn (1997) challenges the whole possibility of forming partnerships in a relationship that is professionally led and controlled. According to him, “partnership cannot originate in systems that are fundamentally unjust” regardless of any good intentions. Even if true partnership is not achieved, the perception of having a common goal or aim with the professional enhances the situation and the relationship. Since satisfaction scores were high in the quantitative data, the professionals seem to be fairly good at balancing the issues of support and control, as well as balancing differing aims.